MY INTERN'S REVIEW ON MY S.P.E.A.R INVESTIGATIVE INTERVIEW TECHNIQUE

 

Robert Lustyik

8/20/25

 

My Experience with Investigative Interviews

 

My time spent with CPI investigations this summer proved to be invaluable in more ways than the term can properly define. In pursuit of a career in law enforcement, I always worried mostly about the environment and the personalities I’d be surrounded by. One can learn and read on his own to gain insights into the mindset and the lifestyle of an investigator at any level, but it provides a whole new perspective on it all when you get the opportunity to be in the same room as these esteemed individuals such as my boss Detective Judd Bank. I was gifted with this chance to experience a glimpse into the personalities and ideologies of an investigator with over thirty years of experience in the field. Going into things, I was very nervous about how I might feel in this realm or whether I could even hope to belong in the same room. I was quickly welcomed and reminded that I am merely a student of a generation that is in need of insightful knowledge from the former. Mr. Bank introduced me to his lifelong field of work and study in an exceptional manner, providing me with his comprehensive blogs and an informative packet that follows the basis of his strategical approach to an investigative interview. 

This strategy is known as S.P.E.A.R., which stands for strategy/structure, planning/preparation, engaging, accounts/clarification, and review/evaluate. Following this baseline strategy, I learned that it is necessary to do things as such because things can quickly become disorganized or you as the investigator can easily lose your foothold in an interview. To have a strategy gives you an instant advantage over the person sitting across from you, as they won’t have something nearly as prepared in response to you unless they are a special class of criminal/individual. The importance of each step proves crucial to winning in an investigative interview and an investigation in general. I carefully use the term “winning” because this is how it must be viewed to defeat the person sitting across from you. There are basic principles everybody should follow regarding morality when dealing with one another on a regular basis, but in an investigative interview these bets are off. 

You must view the person across from you as the opponent in an almost complex version of a chess match. A person trying to hide something illicit from you will do whatever they can to lie and sneak their way out of that room unscathed, and it's your job as an investigator to take advantage of their desire to escape and force them into telling you the truth, whatever the truth may be. The methods of this process range widely and can be employed in multitudes of situations from varying angles, but they all have a simplified trigger to guide the investigator towards their chosen approach. Mr. Bank created a process of identifying approaches through the teachings of a historical samurai known as Miyamoto Musashi. This process does not follow the exact same principles Musashi spoke of in his book called, “The Book of Five Rings”, but it uses the teachings in a modernized recreation. Using different elements of the earth to classify an individual's state of mind makes employing the tactics of an investigator much easier to the alternative of just going with the flow of things. This is not to say that things will always be this simple and a person might be classified as strictly let’s say fire, but having this format remains useful regardless. You can switch the tone at any moment to react accordingly to a suspect’s approach, but you must not take things too far because it’ll be impossible to bring them back down from that level. The approach should typically remain that you as an investigator are trying to befriend the suspect and give them the illusion that you are there for their benefit and their benefit alone. If you decide to tune up the intensity of the interview and put too much pressure on the suspect too soon, you lose the advantage of your befriending illusion and have now become a hostile entity in the eyes of the suspect in question. Retaining posture and employing these more visceral tactics only when necessary is an art that I learned needs perfecting and practice constantly. 

Intuition is a massive factor in this process because it will guide you in the right direction through subtle queues and nuances that only a trained eye can pick up on. To be intuitive in these settings, you must have this knowledge already holstered within your subconscious so that you can react accordingly without having to dwell on any given instance for far too long. Training this instinct is crucial to gain a better understanding of an investigative interview and also to just understand the nature of humans at a much higher level. Only after training in these teachings and techniques can you start to pick up on the subtle queues that might give your insight into the suspect’s mind or better yet the ideas, he is trying to convince you of. This was another massively important thing I learned with my time spent there, which is that you need to be looking for the character the suspect is trying to portray and why they are trying to portray this. People in an uncomfortable situation like this that have something to hide will typically try to convince you of something that expresses their innocence, but it's the investigators job to figure out why they want you to believe this false narrative to decipher which questions to press on further. Understanding this reasoning for a suspect's story opens the doors to which parts of their story need clarification and deeper questioning from the investigator. 

I also had the privilege of witnessing these teachings in real-time being used in an interrogative interview. Sitting in the room gives a completely different perspective as opposed to watching it on YouTube or television. I got to see firsthand what it feels like to be on both sides of the coin in these scenarios because you can feel the tension hanging in the air like no other. All these teachings are just that if you don’t get the chance to see them in practice and truly grasp the reasoning behind their usefulness, so this experience was truly informative. I won’t get into the details of it but it’s safe to say that everything I was taught and am still learning holds true in this environment. 

To conclude, my experience with CPI investigations was that of something I don’t think I could acquire anywhere else. These are not things you can learn so efficiently from any class or YouTube video on the internet. Having Mr. Bank share his lifetime experiences and active working knowledge with me proved to be more useful than most classes I have taken in my entire college career. Learning is just that without the real-world experience to apply it or practice, so it truly was a gift to be a part of, and I will continue to value and practice what I gained for the rest of my life and foreseeable future career.

 

INVESTIGATION CLASSES - NYC

 

 

 CPI Investigations

1325 Avenue of the Americas – 28^{th FL}

New York, NY 10019

Phone: (212) 822-3424

Email:  cpiinvestigations0@gmail.com

Email:  Detectivejudd@gmail.com                                                                                         

If you are considering a career in Private Investigation, or just want to learn the skill sets of a Private Investigator, this course is right for you.

Curriculum

Investigation Interviewing

Interrogation

Surveillance

Criminal Defense Investigation

Introduction to TSCM

Information gathering

Ethics

Three month course

2 Days per week 1 ½ hour per day

$3,000.00 Registration Fee ($2,500.00 early registration fee)

Class begins: January 9^th 2024                                                                                                        

Judd Bank was a former Detective and Polygraph Examiner for the Queen’s District Attorney’s Office.  He is a distinguished lecturer on the topics of interrogation and investigative interviewing for such prestigious venues as the New York City Department of Probation and the Queen’s Bar Association. 

Mr. Bank is a public figure and has starred as the Polygraph Examiner for Conde' Nast Vanity Fair Show Lie Detection and has demonstrated his (SPEAR) Interrogation technique for INC. Magazine.

If you are ready to begin a new and exciting career as a Private Investigator, take the first step to a successful career by enrolling now.

 

Contact: 

Judd Bank

Private Detective

CPI Investigations

1325 Avenue of the America’s – 28^th Fl

New York, NY 10019

(212) 822-3424 (phone)  

website: privatedetectiveny.com

  

THE ART OF INTERROGATION

 

    An interrogation is a conversation with a purpose.  It is a bit more hardcore than an investigative interview where in an interrogation the crime or incident is more severe.  I wrote about this in my last blog, "The Art of the Investigative Interview."

    During an interrogation the Interrogator must be in the moment, always keeping a connection between the Interrogator and the Subject.  It is an interplay between the two; not unlike boxing, fencing and even dancing.  The best analogy I can think of is the correlation between the poker player's mindset and the mindset of the interrogating detective. 

 During my numerous conversations with my brother Mitch, a professional poker player, I begin to recognize these similarities. Both the detective and the poker player must begin with what the Japanese call "Kuuki Yomo" (reading the room).        

   In Poker this is done through tells.  Tells are psychophysiological clues that reveal something about the subject's emotional state and intentions. In an interrogation this is done through adaptors, Body Posture, Body Language and specific behavioral patterns. 

ADAPTORS  

Adaptors are nonverbal gestures like folding of the hands or blinking of the eyes.  This may be an indication that the subject is nervous and is trying to pacify his or her anxiety.  These nonverbal expressions should never be used alone as a determining factor in detecting deceptive behavior.  

BODY POSTURE\BODY LANGUAGE

When using body posture or body language to indicate deception, timing is crucial.  The interrogator must pay attention to the five second interval after a pertinent question is asked.  This is the most probable time the subject's fight or flight reaction can be observed.  An example of this might be inconsistent behavior such as when the subject answers yes, but shakes their head "No." 

BLUFFING

Never show your hand.  As Sun Tsu say"All wars are won through deception."  For instance, imply that you have more evidence than you do, such as forensic evidence or witness testimony.

DISTRACTION

Distraction is at the essence of all tricks because it distracts people's minds and gives the distractor time and space to do something without the subject noticing.  Distraction disguises your true intent.

INDUCED FATIGUE

Many Semi-Pro Poker Players will intentionally sleep all day and play all night hoping to play against players that haven't slept.  When a subject is fatigued, they are more easily manipulated.

INTUITION

Intuitions must be linked to concepts to be useful, Intuitions that are not aligned with valid concepts, are blind intuitions and not reliable.

    In conclusion, both the poker player and detective interrogator must induce the predator\prey response at the proper time while sensing and identifying behavioral clues that are indicative of deception.  This gives the poker player an advantage over the other players and increases the likelihood of winning the game, or in the case of the interrogator obtaining a confession.

About the Author:

Judd Bank is the CEO and Polygraph Examiner of CPI Investigations and was a former Detective for the Queens District Attorney's Office and a life-long Martial Artist.

Website: http://www.privatedetectiveny.com

 

EXECUTIVE PROTECTION SERVICES

 

EXECUTIVE PROTECTION

Our Close Protection Specialists ensure the safety of VIP individuals who may be exposed to elevated personal risks due to their employment, high profile status or net worth.

We are Manhattan's No. 1 Close Protection Agency.

CPI Investigation’s elite team of security specialists will tailor our service to meet all of your protection needs guarantying your personal security while in the Metropolitan area.

 

Our Seasoned Security staff will mitigate threats to your safety by strategically planning each operation considering all variables, ensuring the best possible outcome on behalf of the principle.  This includes planning safe routes, exits and evacuations.     

                                                             

Our Close Protection Specialists are all trained in conflict resolution and de escalation tactics.                                                                                                               

                                                                                                

CONTACT US:

 We at CPI are aware that no one size fits all approach, is appropriate for everyone.

One of our Executive Protection Specialists will work with you to customize a close protection program to meet your specific circumstances.

Contact us for a free consultation.

                                                                                                           

 

 

  

 

 

STRIKE TRAINING METHOD

 

Strike training was created by Doctor Robert Humphrey as a psychophysiological training method designed for Marines, Police Departments and other Military Agencies in order for recruits to overcome their innate fear of being hit and the fear of striking back at an opponent.  Since Doctor Humphrey's passing, his philosophy and training methods were preserved and refined by former Marine Captain and life-long martial artist, Jack Hoban.

The concept of strike training came to Doctor Humphry during his military service as a lieutenant fighting in Iwo Jima.  The young lieutenant noticed that during combat with the Japanese, many of his marines did not return fire, they froze.  The Marines that were more likely to return fire were young men who had hunted game before.  His solution was to have his Marines go down to the beach and shoot into the ocean. This was done to acclimate young marines to become accustom to killing their enemies.  This technique of exposing fearful people to the things they are afraid of in small increments is championed by many Cognitive Behavioral Therapists today.  For instance, if someone were to have a fear of elevators, the therapist would first take their patient to an elevator and have him walk in and out the first day and perhaps go down one flight the next day, then the next day another flight and another flight the following day.  You don't tell them not to be afraid, you allow them to become more courageous. 

The question is, how can you train a recruit to take a punch and strike back under high stress situations.  The standard way this issue was addressed previously, was to set up boxing matches with the recruits. This method turned out to be problematic.  I can best illustrate the problem with this method through my own experience as a Cadet at the Rockland County Police Academy many moons ago.  During our PT Training at West Point after all of us were tired and charley-horsed we were instructed to form a circle and two by two each recruit would enter the circle and box each other.  The problem was that some recruits like myself were experienced boxers at least at the amateur level, while others had never boxed before, and some had never been in a fight their entire life and were terrified. The experienced boxers would dominate the matches every time, this did little to help the inexperienced recruits lessen their fear of physical combat.

STRIKE TRAINING

The session begins by reviewing the biomechanics of the boxing strikes. The proper way to throw a jab, uppercut, hook, cross, etc.  Learning to strike with all of your body, hips, shoulders, legs while always maintaining your military bearing.  Your body should maintain a relaxed attitude slightly coiled in like a cobra ready to strike at any moment.  Like a cobra, your strike should be felt before it is seen.  Your head should be held erect with your spine straight. When you strike, your fists should go forward, not your head, keep your head out of the striking zone.  Your rear hand should be up near your jaw and your elbows should be held in to protect your ribs.  Since you won't have gloves on in a street situation, your stance should more resemble an old bare-knuckled fighter or martial artist than a modern boxer.  your lead hand should extend further out.  Your knees should be slightly bent, with your knees in direct alignment over your feet.

Now the striking mitts come out and everyone breaks up into groups of two, with the person holding the mitts constantly providing feedback to the striker on his or her form, technique, posture and balance.  Certain concepts like crossing a person's T, concentrating on the timing and the space (Kukan) not the timing of the strike, proper angling, distancing, timing and correct breathing methods are taught.  

LINE TRAINING

Before Doctor Humphrey fought in Iwo Jima, he had been a boxer.  He developed line training to help recruits lose their fear of physical combat.  They would be able to practice combat skills in a controlled environment. The recruits would gear up with a helmet, gloves, mouthpiece and cup. Two people would hold opposite ends of a rope creating a barrier between the two recruits.  One is a receiver and one is a striker.  The receiver is the more skilled boxer who receives his opponent's attacks.  He parries, ducks, slips and avoids his opponents attacks occasionally striking back or counter punching. The attacker attacks the receiver, however if he feels overwhelmed, he can simply step back from the rope in order to gain composure and then continue his attack. This way the attacker can learn to take a punch in a safe environment. "The time period after you get hit is the most important time, during this time it is imperative for a fighter to remain calm" (Gus D'Amato).  Since the person that receives the role of the receiver must be much more skilled than the attacker, there will be fewer of them during a given training period, maybe just one or two.  In order for the receiver to fight many candidates, he or she must be able to stay relaxed, conserving energy.  "The most relaxed fighter is always the winner." (Mike Tyson)

THE ETHICAL PROTECTOR

After the intense physical part of this training session, the class gathers around for a discussion period.  Here we discussed Doctor Humphrey's philosophy of being an Ethical Protector and Jack Hoban's Conflict Resolution Techniques.  As Jack Hoban always says "The ethics must govern the tactics, the tactics determine the techniques employed." 

For a better understanding of this type of training method go to www.livingvalues.com.

. 

Keep going onward and upwards.

About the Author

Judd Bank is the CEO of CPI Investigations, was a former Detective for the Queens District Attorney's Office and a life-long Martial Artist.

Website:  www.privatedetectiveny.com

THE ART OF THE INVESTIGATIVE INTERVIEW

THE INVESTIGATIVE INTERVIEW


I would like to share some of the insights I have gathered during my 35 years of experience conducting interrogations, investigative interviews and polygraph examinations for both the public and private sector.  I have honed my skill through conducting thousands of investigative interviews for the Queens District Attorney's Office, where I was a Detective Investigator and Polygraph Examiner.  I also have performed polygraph examinations on level III sex offenders for the New York City Department of Probation where I lectured on my S.P.E.A.R Investigative Technique.  The Legal Aid Society has used my expertise on many occasions as well.  In the private sector, I have conducted interrogations for several of the most prominent armored car companies,  the diamond district, pharmaceutical companies, and private attorneys.

The word interrogation has negative connotations these days, so I prefer to use the term Investigative Interviewing instead.  The most effective method is a psychophysiological non-confrontational approach.  An Investigative Interview is basically a conversation with a purpose.  Before conducting the interview, the Investigator must be well prepared.  The Investigator's mind should be well disciplined.  He\She must know the stratagems that the later verified deceptive Subject might employ in order to attempt to thwart the interview.

The Interviewer must thoroughly understand human behavior, thought processes and the science behind memory recall.

The Investigator should consistently study other interrogations conducted by experts, critique them and continually refine his\her own skills.  Some of the best investigative interviews can be viewed today on YouTube.

The ancient Egyptians worshiped Horus, a hawk headed god whose symbol was an all seeing eye.

                                                              The Eye of Horus

The Egyptians understood the importance of being observant, perceptive, paying attention to even the smallest phenomenon of human behavior.

The Interviewer should possess a combination of intellectual prowess and intuitive insight.  He must be able to subtly shift the subject's mindset from a confident predator mode to an insecure prey mode.

The Interviewer  must be able to pay close attention to the five second time interval after the Subject has answered the Investigator's question.  This is the period where he should be acutely aware of the Subject's body language, posture, gestures, eye contact and micro expressions.

The Interviewer must assume a confident bearing, sitting up straight with shoulders back,.  He should be acutely aware of the changes in the Subject's posture.  He must have a thorough understanding of how a Subject's bearing modifies when he is being deceptive.

The Investigator must convince the Subject that coming clean is the best option for his well being and self interest. This can be best accomplished by offering the Subject two different scenarios:

One where the Subject's actions were detestable and would lead to serious consequences.
The other, a more forgiving, sympathetic scenario that might lead to a more amenable outcome mitigating his circumstance.  This is the time period where the Subject will either make an admission or go into a state of denial.

Often when the Subject confesses you will observe a change in body language, posture and gestures exhibiting a sign of relief.  At this point, allow the Subject to talk freely.  As Napoleon Bonaparte once said "Never interrupt an enemy when he is making a mistake".

Should the Subject go into denial, it is imperative that the Interviewer take action by interrupting the Subject's mindset and not allow the Subject to negatively reinforce his\her position and thereby make the chance of admission unlikely.

An effective technique for breaking the Subject's train of thought during a denial period is to ask a revealing question, for example ("What if I where to tell you that someone saw you at the location in question"), another example would be ("The forensic evidence will show that you were at the scene of the crime or incident"}.  People fear forensic evidence due to the fact they watch too much CSI, so it is an effective tool to use.

REVIEW AND EVALUATE

After the Investigator obtains the pertinent information he seeks, he must review the information obtained and determine its actual value and probative potential.   The Investigator should correlate the information he has obtained with previously known facts and other additional information that was obtained through interviews with other individuals who were also involved with the incident in question.

If you would like to get a deeper understanding of the Art of the Investigative Interview, you are welcome to attend my S.P.E.A.R Investigative Interviewing Seminar.  My next lecture will be announced soon.

About the Author:       

Judd Bank is the CEO of  CPI Investigations, licensed in New York and New Jersey.   http://www.privatedetectiveny.com

WU WEI: THE ART OF LIVING IN THE ZONE

Wu means non. Wei means action, or more precisely execute, doing, engagement, striving, and busyness. It doesn't imply or mean doing nothing, but letting your mind alone, trusting it to work by itself trusting in life's flow.

It is a kind of effortless action, like when an athlete is in the zone. Being in harmony with nature, both natural and human, having the feeling of always meaningfully engaging in life.  It is the art of effortless living.

There are plausible connections between modern science and ancient wisdom.  There is a dualism in life.  Neurological studies have shown that the brain is divided into two parts.  The left hemisphere  specializes in analytic thought, logic, language, reasoning, science, math, written and numbers skills and Right - hand control.  The right hemisphere specializes in Art awareness, creativity, imagination, intuition, insight, holistic thought, music awareness, 3-D forms and Left-hand control.

The wisest way to orient yourself in the world is to find the balance of these cognitive operations, between the known and the unknown.



Describing Wu Wei is difficult.  It is akin to describing a new color. Somethings can't be understood intellectually.  They must be grasped intuitively.

There is a profound unavoidable mystery in our very existence.  Giving up trying to control life enables one to master life. Amorfati - embrace your fate.  You've been dealt the cards, now enjoy the game.

Doing things in accordance with the grain, doesn't mean you don't cut wood at all.  It means that you cut wood along the lines where the wood is most easily cut.

Don't force anything.  Act in accord with the pattern of things as they exist. Without a proper understanding of the subject, it is better not to act at all.   An example of this is when Mao Tse-tung was confronted with the problem of birds eating chinese farmers crops, reducing the output of production;  his solution was to send the army into the infected areas and shoot all the birds.  This created a much larger problem because the birds ate the insects and when left unchecked, the insects destroyed all of the crops causing a great famine.

Chairman Mao

Float downstream instead of struggling upstream.  Eliminate all your psychic obstructions.  A master's performance in any art should  appear as if it was conducted effortlessly in a near  unconscious state.

Albert Einstein, said that he had come up with his finest insights in physics while smoking his pipe and going into a trance like state. 

Albert Einstein

Be true to your original nature.  Sometimes it is best to follow your instincts, they are gifts from your subconscious that can help you steer away from life's dangerous currants.

Sometimes the best way to explain what something is, is to describe that thing once it is lost. This is best illustrated through a poetic statement Ernest Hemingway made about F. Scott Fitzgerald.  Hemingway referred to the period of time in Fitzgerald's life where he was unable to recreate the elegance of his earlier masterpieces like the Great Gatsby.  "His talent was as natural as the pattern that was made by the dust on a butterfly's wings. At one time he understood it no more than the butterfly did and he did not know when it was brushed or marred.  Later, he became conscious of his damaged wings and of their construction and he learned to think and could not fly anymore because the love of flight was gone and he could only remember when it had been effortless".

Hemingway

F. Scott Fitzgerald

About the Author:  Judd Bank is the president of CPI Investigations,

 a multi dimensional private investigation firm with offices in 

Manhattan and Paramus, NJ.

Website:  http://www.privatedetectiveny.com 

HOW TO LIVE A TRANQUIL LIFE

Memento Mori - Remember thou art mortal.

Pondering one's own death can be quite beneficial, it enables us to treasure our lives.  Death is as natural as birth, but we don't want to think about our mortality. Accepting that we only have a certain amount of days left to live reminds us that we must make the most out of each day and we become more likely to make better decisions.  How many more full moons will you get to see?  Be courageous when you confront the face of death.  Your life perspective shapes your reality.  Happiness is a choice.  "Every man has two lives, and the second one starts when he realizes he only has one." (Confucius) 


DESPAIR

In life we often experience despair, hopelessness, depression and anxiety. These emotions  prevents us from being the best version of ourselves.  Always remember, that although life is full of catastrophes, tragedies, and malevolence, there is something about the human spirit that allows us to survive and transcend ourselves so that we may lead a noble life.  These experiences are only temporary and a challenge to test your mettle. We must think of despair as a learning experience and  thereby triumph over hopelessness. Gambatte (keep going).

"You can learn more from a teardrop than from a telescope." - Bruce Lee 

HOPE

Hope conquers despair.  Picture yourself driving on a treacherous mountain road in foul stormy weather.
The road is winding and slippery.  You have a choice regarding what perspective you will take.  You could concentrate on the thought that you are going to skid off the road and drop to your painful death.  On the other hand, you can hope that everything will be ok, and have faith in the fact that if you slow down and drive carefully you will get home in safely.
Amor Fati (Embrace your fate)

MEDITATION

The practice of meditation can create remarkable changes in your life.  It can improve your level of awareness, increase your level of attention, reduce stress, lower blood pressure, boost your immune system, and lessen cognitive decline. There are many methods of meditation just as there are many different styles of music, dance and art.

Here are three that I practice:


ZEN:

This meditation technique is based upon trying to quiet what Buddhists call your "monkey mind" or "wandering mind"  It's usually done sitting in a comfortable position while concentrating on your breathing.  You observe your thoughts bu you don't linger on them.  You are seeking to understand your true nature.  Knowing others is wisdom, knowing yourself leads to the path to enlightenment.

TAOIST MEDITATION:

 Taoist meditation is a type of moving meditation such as Tai Chi or Chi Kung.  It's purpose is to become one with nature and the flow of the universe.  The Taoist practitioner attempts to obtain a state of Wu Wei, a spontaneous effortless action in which the practitioner flows through life like an athlete always in the zone.

WESTERN STOIC MEDITATION:
  This type of meditation is advocated by the Stoic Philosophers, such as Marcus Aurelius.  Marcus Aurelius was an emperor of Rome who could have had  anything in life, but instead chose a virtuous manner of living.  The Stoic practitioner reflects upon his actions at the end of each and every day.    He asks himself  "Did I accomplish everything I set out to do that day?"  If something went wrong, what can I do to mend it and how can I learn from the mistakes I might have made that day?".  He asks himself "What can I do to improve tomorrow in order to move onward and upward?"  If he has accomplished all he could that day, then it is time to go home, relax, rest and have a peaceful night's sleep.  He does not ponder on things that are not in his control..

FRIENDSHIP

Nothing gives a person more pleasure than the bonds forged between good true friends.  Their presence soothes our minds, reduces our anxiety and their opinions help shape our decisions adding joy and comfort to our lives.  Their encouragement keeps us going even through our darkest times.
CHOOSE YOUR FRIENDS WISELY.


About the Author:

Judd Bank
CEO of CPI Investigations, NY and a life long Martial Artist.
Website: http://www.privatedetectiveny.com

BEWARE OF THE SOCIOPATHS AMONG US

One out of every 25 people is a sociopath or exhibits extreme narcissistic behavior according to researchers today.

While mapping out the brain, a group of neuroscientists in stamford, discovered that the area in which we feel pain, overlaps the area in which we feel empathy.  Sociopaths do not make this connection.  They are self absorbed and don't feel the pain of others.

The problem is that sociopaths are all around us, but don't stand out in obvious ways and may be difficult to detect.

In this article, I will concentrate on Sociopathic behavior in the workplace and in our personal relationships.  The trouble is that sociopathic behavior is often rewarded in the workplace.  Sociopaths can be quite charismatic.  In our relationships, the people we care about are the ones we give the power to manipulate us the most.

If the sociopath has a position of power over you, he or she would act a bully.  If your co-worker or loved one's friend is a sociopath, he or she would act as a snake sabotaging you at any opportunity they get.

Sociopaths know the price of everything and the value of nothing. They will lie to your face with no hint of remorse.  They do not want you to succeed and won't support you for fear of who you may become.  They are completely self centered and absorbed. They sometimes act like hyper-aggressive two year olds.  They are master manipulators.

Being subject to the remorseless list and evil manipulations of someone who has decided to mess with your life would be both terrifying and demoralizing.

"if you hate a person you hate something in them that is a part of yourself.  What isn't a part of yourself does'nt disturb us." - Hermann Hesse 


WHY DO WE LET THEM TAKE ADVANTAGE OF US?

Sociopaths have a keen ability to sense our weaknesses.  They attack what Japanese Budo practitioners call Kosshi Points (vulnerable targets).  They attack our fears, insecurities and lack of confidence.


HOW DO WE DEAL WITH SOCIOPATHIC PEOPLE?

First, get your mind, spirit and body in the right place.  Begin by getting in touch with what Carl Gustave Jung called your shadow side, the darker regions of your subconscious.  This step is important, enables us to resist being exploited and gives us the strength to withstand tragedy and malevolence in order to fight back.  Learn to become a dangerous person.

Next study yourself, what make you unique?  Where do your values come from?  Why do you do things the way you do?  Develop your self confidence and self esteem in order to confront you fears.
Pay attention to your talents, achievements and advantages.
.

Set goals for yourself, start with small ones first, and then build upon your success.  Achieving your goals would be your ticket out of your undesirable situation.  Treat your conversations with a sociopath like a battlefield.  Your words and your ideas are your weapons.




Pick your battles. "You will never reach your destination, if you stop and throw rocks at every dog that barks". - Winston Churchill. 

If you have observed these traits in an individual and believe that person is a sociopath, beware of having an emotional response during your confrontation with them. A sociopath will take them as weaknesses and try to use them against you. Sometimes its best not to meet a hostile force head on, instead roll with the punches until you find the opportunity to strike.

When confronting a sociopath assume a relaxed posture, breath naturally, and be sure to take a moment before you answer them in order to compose yourself and contemplate your best response.  Stay alert and try not to be intimidated.

  As George Harrison once sang "beware of darkness" 

bout the Author:  
Judd Bank is the President of CPI Investigations and a life long Martial Artist.
http://www.privatedetectiveny.com

ENDURING LIFE

I believe that all bad fortune can be conquered through endurance, courage and hope.

In life we can't control what's happening but we can strive to control the way we respond to what's happening.  Nothing, except our thoughts, is totally in our control.  We can create our misery or joy independent of our surroundings.

Certain aspects of the future are out of our control.  Concern yourself with what is in your control.


LEARNING FROM ZEN ARCHERY

A Zen Archer will practice proper breathing, good form and concentration.  He can buy the finest bows and the most exquisite arrows.  These things are in his control, Once he releases his arrow, he must let it fly.  At this point many outside variables can influence the outcome.   Wind, terrain, the weather; these things can effect the arrow's flight. Since the Archer cannot completely adjust for all these variables before he shoots his arrow, they are not in his control.  He should embrace and accept what is not in his control.

Of course validation comes from hitting the target, it is the successful conclusion to a task. The Archer should not find his self-worth  from hitting the bullseye.  I am not saying that there is not much to learn from failure (perhaps everything worth learning) only that his validation should not depend on his success, just his betterment.

INNER JOURNEY

If you should decide to heroically embark in a journey of self analysis you might find it painful.  Use the pain to take action, make the changes that are necessary to prevent yourself from living a sort of blissfully dissatisfied life, or what the group Pink Floyd referred to as being "comfortably numb."

Do not regard hardships or adversity as misfortunes, instead view them as learning experiences.
Excessive worry about the future causes anxiety.  Embrace you fate and enjoy life.

BETRAYAL

Sometimes in relationships or friendships, we project our feelings unto other people.  We think that if we care so much about someone that person should feel the same way about us.  We delude ourselves.  Some people's brains are wired differently.  They will lie to your face without any qualms.  They will cheat you, deceive you and attempt to destroy your wellbeing.  They are only motivated by their own desires. We get blindsided and are vulnerable because we have exposed our inner self to them.  What should we do when we experience betrayal?  It is best to let go. Don't fight for resolution, don't ask for explanations and don't pursue answers. There is a time to cross over bridges and there is a time to burn them down and build new ones.

CONCLUSION

Wonder is the beginning of wisdom.  Pay attention to even the most  smallest details in life.  Be open minded to new ideas and remain flexible in your thoughts.  Treat all your endeavors with care, focus, intensiveness and passion.

In the words of Masaaki Hatsumi, founder of the bujinkan  "gambatte" (keep going)
















About the Author: 

Judd Bank is the President of CPI Investigations and a life long Martial Artist.
http://www.privatedetectiveny.com

BIRTHDAY BLOG

As my birthday approaches, I find myself contemplating my life in our world of accelerated change and overwhelming complexity.  I've discovered that by writing down my reflections, it helps clarify my thoughts.

I have always believed that the combination of eastern and western thoughts, the esoteric and the practical is the best approach to understanding life.

As I grow older, I feel that the life ahead of me is more important than the life behind me. I tried to be the best version of myself that I tried be.  Everyday I try to be as nice to people as possible.  A meaningful life is the only life worth living.

If you have a family and a few good friends that love you, a roof over your head and food to eat, you are rich.

The most beautiful things in life cannot be touched, they must be felt.  You can't always be strong in life but you can always be brave.  Your failures are your most powerful tools.

When wise men say that "you should live for the moment," they don't mean not learning from your past, they mean not regretting a past you cannot change.  They don't mean not preparing for your future, they mean not being anxious about a future that may or may not be.    Make good use of all your potentials and possibilities.

Don't blame other people for the structure of your reality.  Shallow people believe in luck and circumstances, strong people believe in cause and effect.

Control your outside world by controlling your inside world.  You are not the product of your circumstances.   You are the product of your decisions.

All exceptional people were not versions of someone else, they were themselves.

Self discipline is paramount.  Do things that are difficult, push through the pain, show your character.

The most selfish thing that you can do for yourself is helping others.

The only antidote to tragedy is self transformation.

Perhaps life gives us problems in order for us to learn how to solve them.

You must keep on fighting for what you want, or what you don't want will take over. 

A young man is like a tiger, his body is strong and his mind is raging.  As time passes, the tiger goes chasing the dragon.  When he becomes older, his body is strong one day, not so strong the next.  His mind becomes calmer, more fluent and wiser.  He becomes the dragon.  





DEATH 

No one knows what happens when we die.  However, it seems evident that there is a heaven and hell on earth.  You can clearly see people that are in a living hell, and you can certainly see people who are living a heavenly life.

After careful contemplation I believe that people who believe in an afterlife are happier than people who don't.  Several years ago, I attended RGI, a conflict resolution seminar hosted Mr. Jack Hoban.  One of the speakers at the seminar was a decorated Marine knick named Joe Marine.  Joe said that when he speaks to his marines, he tells them that they should believe in something.  He states "I don't care if it is a rock, believe in something, it is the only way that combat can be tolerable."  I suspect the same is true in life.

You shouldn't be afraid of death, you should be afraid of dying without the world seeing the person you could have become, the best version of yourself.

Carl Jung believed that consciousness is not entirely confined by time and space.  Hopefully he is right.

One thing is for certain, as George Harrison once sang "All things must pass, all things must pass way.

About the Author:  
Judd Bank is the President of CPI Investigations and a life long Martial Artist.
http://www.privatedetectiveny.com